Romeo and Juliet

I've been watching a video of Romeo and Juliet recently. It's the Prokofiev version, some of my favorite music. But it's the dancers who really have me transfixed.

This videotape is of the Royal Academy of Ballet's 1966 production of the ballet, with Margot Fonteyn and Rudolf Nureyev. They are two of the most well-known dancers of the 20th century, and this video shows why they are! The pics above are from the movie. I wish they were bigger!

I'm especially watching Fonteyn. I knew that she danced way into middle age, and Nureyev was her partner then. As I watched her dance the role of Juliet, I fell in love with her style. She dances so fluidly, her body flowing and her movements seemingly effortless. Perhaps the RAD was consciously reacting against Balanchine's attention to crisp technique (Balanchine was a famous choreographer of about the same time).

I wanted to see this version because I'd heard about Fonteyn and Nureyev and how there was electricity when they danced together. The Fonteyn-Nureyev duo was famous. In this production, they have such chemistry on stage--you could almost believe they were Romeo and Juliet, or that they loved each other passionately.

They did love each other, but not romantically. Nureyev was gay. In fact, his homosexuality was the big reason he defected from USSR, which thought him a threat to the country's family values and wanted him in custody. But Fonteyn and Nureyev were close friends all their lives.

I wondered aloud how old Fonteyn was for this production. Bruce looked it up and we discovered that she was 47.

47! When there are closeups, you can tell that her open, expressive face is not the face of a 13-year-old Juliet. Her face is beautiful, and so is her dancing. She inspires me. If one can be the prima ballerina at that age, then certainly one can learn to dance en pointe or earn a black belt at 44.

The video reminded me of another I've watched, one called "I am a Dancer," which shows Nureyev at work in the studio and performing a couple of pieces. At one point, they show him at the barre, sweaty and working hard. Then you hear him speaking in a voice-over, saying that if he even misses one day of practice, he can feel it in the way his body moves.

OK. Makes me feel better that I was moving slowly and awkwardly at TKD today after a full week away!

Performance

"So, what I'm asking you is, would you be willing to do a short dance piece for tomorrow?"

It's 6 in the evening and one of the people in my small group at the faculty workshop is in my room.

"Yes," I answer her. "I'll do it. But you have to teach it to me!"

So the next morning, there I am, demonstrating a dance for our small group. No problem.

I'm not sure I would have always felt comfortable doing this. I've always had a bit of performance anxiety. I don't like to be a "soloist," I always said. It makes me nervous to be in the spotlight; I don't really like the idea of having everyone watching me, expectant.

That was one of the things I wanted to work on in martial arts: to learn focus and concentration and confidence in performance, especially in solo performance.

I think I am growing in that area, becoming more confident, able to focus, less nervous. That will be good for many aspects of my life.

Yin Yang

"Cool yin-yang necklace," says Peter, the guest speaker at our workshop. Peter has just used a yin-yang symbol to illustrate some of the tensions that exist in teaching and learning. (Challenging students while also encouraging them; being a coach while also being an evaluator--"opposites" that actually interact with each other, meeting and departing, etc etc etc.)

"Yeah," I say. "I'm learning martial arts, so I love this sign."

"Martial arts?" Peter is interested.

"I'm learning Tae Kwon Do."

"Jane is actually a dangerous weapon," jokes my colleage Bob, who's also helping to lead the workshop.

People often make this joke. It's especially funny because I'm small, blonde, female, middle-aged, an intellectual. Ha ha. A weapon.

Though it's a joke, this is one of those areas of martial arts where I don't feel confident. I don't feel like a weapon. I don't feel like a warrior. Though I like sparring, that's a game. Real fighting--I don't have that instinct.

"Pretend you're in a life and death situation," Brian had told me when I was worried about breaking boards for my test.

"If it's a life and death situation, I'm running away," I had replied. "I don't have that instinct."

Is that OK? Do I need to develop that fighting instinct more? Is that why I want to learn martial arts? Maybe, a bit. Being more of a fighter--both physical and metaphorical--might not be a completely bad thing.

Back to the workshop, though.

"Martial arts are good," says Peter, ignoring Bob's remark. "You develop focus, strength, calmness. That's good."

Yes. I think that's where I am, with Peter's view. Still, might not be bad to develop the Yang to my Ying and learn to be more of a fighter.

Forms in the sand

First full day of the faculty workshop. Problem with these things: lots of sitting and talking and thinking. Lots of eating (great food here). Very little exercise!

I tried to remedy this by doing some ballet and TKD during a break in the workshop. Worked through Suki's extended ballet warmup and some TKD stretches. Then moved outside to do my forms.

Forms are kind of an indoor thing. Doing them outside is . . . different. Underfoot was grass and sandy soil that squished under my bare toes. The four walls of the dojang were missing (which way am I facing? Toward the flags?). The beautiful view of Lake Michigan, the sounds of the waves, and the soft breeze threatened to distract me. Still, it was fun!

I finished up my workout with a brisk 45-minute hike through the woods. I was rewarded with the sighting of a little grove of wildflowers I've never seen before: Yellow Lady's Slippers! That's the flower at the top of this post.

Dateline: Door County

Hello blog-readers. I'm writing to you from a little laptop in the greatroom of a beautiful lodge in Door County Wisconsin. Here's the lodge from the outside.

When I arrived, I thought maybe I was at Edoras (LOTR fans, notice that roofline!)

And here's the shore of Lake Michigan.


I'm here for a faculty workshop--I'm actually part of the group leading the workshop. So I'm trading my taekwondomom hat for my professor hat for a while. But we do have wireless internet, so I hope to post on my blog now and then.

And I may even do a bit of TKD while I'm here!

Photographer boy

Robbie's been my photographer at the last 2 or 3 promotional tests at TKD. He likes to fiddle with my digital camera, make movies, and take photos. I like him to be there, in that friendly and disciplined space, doing something he enjoys, being around people who know him and care about him.

This time, I wasn't sure if he'd make it. The test was scheduled for 9 a.m., so I was leaving the house at 8:30--earlier, I thought, than he'd want to leave Saturday morning cartoons.

"Hey Robbie, you wanna take pictures at the test today?" I yelled.

There was a pause.

"No, I'm gonna stay here and build with LEGOs," he said.

So I headed for the door. But as I opened it, Robbie yelled from the living room. "I changed my mind. I'll go."

He trotted in and grabbed my cameras. "But I don't like Tae Kwon Do, and I'm not gonna talk to anyone."

He bolted past me and into the car.

I'm not sure what this "not gonna talk to anyone" thing is all about. Especially with Robbie, who practically does not shut up when he's with me. When we're together, it's "Mom" this and "Mom" that. At one point on the trip to Wisconsin with the TKD group, he was talking just about non-stop, he was so excited.

But he can also do that sullen, silent pre-teen "not gonna talk" thing. I've seen him do it at church, and even at school. "Robbie's a smart kid. But I wish he'd participate in class discussions more," said his teacher at one point. Are we talking about the same kid? I thought.

When we arrived at the dojang, Savaun said "hi" to Robbie, who did not say anything. This annoyed me, as they had always liked hanging out together when R was in TKD. Maybe he was embarassed.

But Robbie had fun taking photos. You may have seen the "movie" of sparring that he made--on the previous day's blogpost. Here are some more of his shots.

Here we are doing basic moves. You can see how big our dojang is and how small our testing group was.



Here I am sparring with Mindy and then with Pam. Both are a good challenge!




Robbie took some photos of other people sparring--and having a good time. Here's Savaun and someone else.

Brian A. is sparring Grace here.


I'm glad Robbie got photos of my elbow strike break. Master Hughes and Mr. Houtz are holding for me, just like they did for that photo of me doing a flying side kick break when I was an orange belt!



At the end of the test, Master Hughes announced that he hoped to have a picnic out at his Dad's house where kids could ride a go-cart, ATVs, and mini-bikes. Robbie's eyes lit up. "I'm going!" he said. And on the way out, we chatted with John and Dillon about computer games and CGI.

I really wish Robbie was still in Tae Kwon Do. It is such a great way to direct and control energy. Robbie has a lot of energy, and he's not always good at directing and controlling it. But he really lost interest in Tae Kwon Do, and despite my encouragement and firmness, it eventually became too much of a struggle; he didn't see how to make it his own. Going to Tae Kwon Do became something I decided on and controlled, not Robbie. That was enough to make him rebel against it.

And that's probably where that "I'm not going to talk to anyone" thing came about. He wants to tell me that he's in control when it comes to his Tae Kwon Do future.

Still. If Robbie can be part of this wonderful group at least sometimes--as photographer, as event-attender, as black-belt-cake-eater--I'll be happy. I believe he'll soak up some of the goodness of our dojang in those small doses.

Good Test

I arrive at the June promotional test in a downpour. Robbie's with me and we dart into the building. It's warm inside, which feels good for a moment, but I know it'll get hot later. I change and head out into the dojang.

It's a small group testing today, only two rows. That's, what, 14 people? My first test, the rows of students went all the way to the back. Our school is shrinking. At test time, though, that's nice.

Mr. Houtz appears, dressed up, to judge with the other black belts. I shake his hand and we chat a bit.

"I hope you'll start working out with us again," I tell him.

"Maybe I should do yoga with you again sometime," he laughs. He tells me about a "yoga for runners" class. Mr. Houtz runs in races and has some trouble with arthritis in his hip.

"That sounds like a good class for you," I tell him.

Robbie sits at the back with two cameras. He uses my digital one to make a movie of the whole group doing forms. He's up front when he makes it, so Savaun is right in front!

"It looks like a battle," says Robbie. That's a compliment. You can watch at the link below.

Forms movie.

Movies take up a lot of space on a little camera like mine, so the rest of the time he uses my film camera, getting some shots of me sparring--and of me breaking those boards!

I must say that breaking went well. I've been putting it out of my mind so I won't worry. I set up for the front elbow break very carefully. Arm breaks scare me. Master Hughes gives me some tips--he and Mr. Houtz are holding for me. "Hit with the meat of your arm," he says. "My arms don't have meat," I point out.

But I break, first try. Only a small bruise.

I get ready to do my jump reverse kick (two boards--before the test, Ms. Pryor has once again urged me to try two boards), but Master Hughes only has one. I ask him about it, but he says one is fine. Who am I to argue?

That break also goes well--I think I could have broken two.

Ms. Pryor asks me about it later. "I'd like to break two. Maybe we can do it in class sometime," I say. "Just to prove I can do it."

When I go up to talk to Nancy, my black belt judge, she compliments me. "Good test," she says. She says it more than once. It's nice to hear.

We're all drenched with sweat by the time we leave, and tired, too. Robbie has finished my roll of film. I'll post those pictures--and probably some of Brian A.'s--when I can.

Closer to black?

I'm getting closer to getting that black belt, I guess. Brian has already ordered us and Matthew the little black/brown belt key chains--and I think he's ordered the black belt ones, too.

I like his confidence.

"And if I quit?" I asked him once. I'm not always confident.

"I'll come to your house and take you to class."

I sometimes feel confident about being in the upper color-belt ranks. Like when someone asks me to help them with a form, and I can.

But I often feel a bit over my head these days. It may look like I'm getting closer to being a black belt, but I sometimes feel like I'm just becoming asymptotic to that goal.

(Math metaphor courtesy of 11th grade math.)

An estimate

"How many classes have you had?"

I'm about to turn in my test application to Master Hughes and he points out a line I've left blank.

"How many classes? Since the last test?" I figure a bit--8 weeks, about 2 classes a week.

I write down 16.

"Sixteen? You've only had 16 classes?" Master Hughes hands the sheet back to me.

"He means since you started Tae Kwon Do," Ms. Pryor explains.

"Since I started?! I have no idea how many classes since I've started!" I say.

But I figure it out. 8 weeks between tests, about 2 classes a week, give or take. This will be my . . . 9th test.

144 classes. Approximately.

Exercise or Exertion

I was going to exercise today--my plan was to swim at the Y.

But I ran out of energy. I used it on a chore instead.

Summer, when the kids are home, is my time for doing Big Chores. My teaching/freelance schedule means that I have a very flexible and light work schedule in summer. So I postpone the big stuff until now.

Today's chore: staining the deck.

I'd washed it yesterday, so I just needed to put down the Thompson's Water Seal. I did it with rollers, a small one for the railings and picnic table, a big one for the floor of the deck. Much faster than a brush, which is what I used before.

Still, at 5 p.m. when Bruce arrived home, I was immobile on the couch, unable to get up and go to the Y for a swim!

I remember reading once that exercise was different--and better for you--than just plain old physical exertion (cleaning house, painting, staining the deck). Something about it being more relaxing and focused on making one stronger. The idea was that even if you are physically active in your day, you should also be sure to get some real, recreational exercise--sustained cardio, or weights, or stretching, etc.

Still, I don't know how people with jobs that require lots of physical exertion can manage to exercise TOO.

I'm putting off the swim until tomorrow when Bruce comes home for lunch. And no deck-staining tomorrow (I'm all done!).

Ballet-ish

After a week of rehearsals and thinking about ballet most of the time, I'm feeling very ballet-ish. I said to Brian that I just have to get back into the TKD mode. My next promotional test is this Saturday.

Sometimes I wonder if doing both ballet and TKD at the level at which I'm doing them is a bit too much. Recently I've been feeling stretched in both classes, like I'm keeping up, but just barely.

Of course, I don't really mind that feeling, too much. There's something exciting and invigorating about learning something new. And I like the way I often see how martial arts and ballet parallel one another in some ways. Still, I wonder if I could do better in one or the other if I dropped one.

I'm not ready to drop either one yet.

On the Recital

Hope you all enjoyed the recital photos. I thought it might be nice to give a behind-the-scenes look at a studio's end-of-year recital. Besides, that's where I was, behind the scenes. I was also the photographer; hence, few photos of the taekwondomom!

I spent almost the whole day at the theatre. There was a final dress rehearsal in the morning. Then at 4, there was a class for the advanced dancers. I decided to go, and I just got make-up on and hair done after that and before the show.

Besides helping girls with dresses and hair, I also did some babysitting for the little boy dancers--they were in the picture. They thought that next year there should be a "boys only" dance, and that it should involve weapons.

Bruce and the boys went to the show, arriving at the beginning of Act II! It made such a difference to me, knowing that my guys were out there watching me.

Robbie said, "You looked like you were having fun, being picked up."

Bruce said, "Your number got the loudest applause, though that's not scientific."

All in all, an enjoyable day. There's supposed to be a DVD of the recital; I'll see if I can put a clip on this blog.

Recital Photos

Learning

"You don't learn from a situation where you do something well. You enjoy it and you give yourself credit, but you don't really learn from that. You learn from trial and error, trial and error all the time."

--Suzanne Farrell, former principal ballerina for George Balanchine's American Ballet Theatre.

Wrong

I was wrong about the ballet rehearsal schedule.

This is what I said a couple days ago about the detailed rehearsal schedule for Thursday night:

the times crack me up--it's hard for me to imagine the Tech rehearsal will run smoothly enough for those 10-minute windows to be correct!

Wrong, wrong, wrong. The rehearsal was EXACTLY on schedule. Wow.

Robbie said he wants to see the show! (Maybe not to see me--I told him about the dance after ours that was choreographed to music from Star Wars. . . ) I think if the guys arrive right about 7 at intermission, they'll be able to get in then and just see the 2nd half, including our dance. And Star Wars.

Now if only Bruce and Eli can be talked into it :-)

Moments

"We do not remember days; we remember moments."

Are you . . . ?
"Are you one of the teachers here?"

I'm getting ready for class over near the edge of the dojang when one of the parents speaks to me.

"I'm not a teacher," I say to the older man who's sitting in one of the folding chairs. "Would you like me to get one of the teachers for you?"

"Well, I just had a question about that student oath that the kids take . . . "

I listen to him, and it turns out he feels that he had been disrespected by one of the young students waiting for a ride outside the dojang.

"I'll let the teacher know about it," I tell him.

Ms. Pryor says she'll have a word with Master Hughes. "Kids just need to be reminded," I say. She nods.

Anyone here . . . ?

"Anyone here not want to sweat today?" Ms. Pryor asks us once we're lined up. "Because today's going to be a workout where we sweat!"

It's hot in here and I'm already sweating . . .

Do you really . . . ?

"Do you really take ballet?" asks Jessie. We're working on some simple sparring techniques and 10-year-old junior black-belt Jessie is my partner.

"Yes, I do," I tell her.

"Do you do this?" she asks. She holds her arms above her head in a circle, the icon for ballerina.

"Yup," I say. I show her the correct way to do 5th position in relevé.

Then I show her how to spot when doing turning kicks. She says she hates turning kicks. "It's a ballet trick," I say. "Look at your target, and as you turn, make sure your eyes get back to the target before your kick does." She does it, and does an excellent reverse hook kick.

Anyone want to . . . ?
We've just finished some simple tumbling, wonderfully fun somersaults that go right into a jump front snap kick. Then we do cartwheels. I've forgotten how fun this is to do!

Ms. Pryor is stacking up a pile of pads in front of one of the mats.

"Anyone want to do a diving somersault over this?"

No way.

But it's fun to watch Justin and Brian A. do it! I wish I had my camera!

Ballet Week

(That photo is not of me; it's just from the web. I keep forgetting to have Suki take pictures during our rehearsals, but I wanted a photo!)

Feeling a bit nervous as this is the week of rehearsals before Sunday's ballet recital. The teachers were glad to have us adults doing a number--gave the younger students some time to change costume, etc. Glad to know we're appreciated!

So, this week:
Tues: 11 a.m. class, rehearsal (we worked a bit extra on the tour jetés and lifts)

Thurs: 11:30 a.m. class, rehearsal.

4 p.m. Tech rehearsal starts at Paramount. We're on at "8:20-8:30" (the times crack me up--it's hard for me to imagine the Tech rehearsal will run smoothly enough for those 10-minute windows to be correct!)

(If my guys want to see the show, I may invite them to come to this rehearsal or Sunday's--so they can see it, but don't have to stay for the whole thing.)

(Will they want to see it? I don't know. They didn't stay for the liturgical dance on Easter, nor did they see the last recital I was in.)

Sun: 8:30 a.m. call for final rehearsal; we're on sometime after 11:15.

4:00 p.m. call for 6:00 p.m. recital, which will supposedly be done by 8:25. (this cracks me up, too; there are more than 2 dozen dances!)

OK. Having it down here in print makes it seem more reasonable. We have 3 more rehearsals, two on the actual stage, and can go over the dance a couple times on Thursday. I guess we'll be ready.

Next week will be TKD week, I promise! Test day coming up June 10!

Memorial

Memorial Day is one of those "small" holidays for us--big enough to mean there's no school, but too short to travel to have a picnic with family or to plant the geraniums on Grandma and Grandpa H.'s cemetery plot (what we always did when I was a kid).

So it's just our little family.

Last year, we visited a cemetery in a small town east of here. It's an old one, overgrown, and it's filled with wildflowers. This year, we went again, mostly to see the wildflowers, but also to visit a cemetery on this appropriate day.



Lots of the grave markers are worn so badly that they're hard to read, but some still tell a story. "Sarah E.," one said, "aged 29 years 4 months. Devoted wife, loving mother, trusted friend." She died mid-19th century, probably after childbirth, I'd guess.

Another monument was labeled with 4 names, all babies who died before they were a year old.

There were a few veterans' graves, marked with little flags, probably put there by the local VFW. This one said the soldier had fought in Korea.

It all made me think about soldiers and warriors. Many martial arts commentators and writers say that we are learning to be warriors. We certainly are learning to fight. And I've chosen this way, this "do"--to learn how to fight, though I'm far from being an aggressive person.

What about soldiers? Are they warriors?

After we visited the cemetery, we visited a museum that had an exhibit on the 1960s. There were photos and posters showing American soldiers in Viet Nam. One in particular caught my eye. The soldier was in full uniform, with some kind of ammunition on him and a gun; he wore a helmet. But his face--it was young. He didn't look aggressive or brave. He looked dazed. He was probably the age of my college students--the average age of soldiers in that war was 22. So he might have been younger, too, the age of Justin or Cavio (Cavio says she's going to join the army).

The guy in the poster didn't look like a warrior. He looked like a young man doing a job he was told to do, a scary job.

Ms. Pryor says her older son, a high school junior now, wants to join the Marines. She's not happy about it.

"But you were in the service--why not him?" I ask. Ms. Pryor was in the army, someone told me.

"There's a war on now," she reminds me. "A stupid war. Of course, he's 17. He doesn't think he'll get killed."

And that's what most armies need, isn't it? Is that a mark of a warrior, too?

How the workout started . . .

Only 5 students in class today--it's a holiday weekend. Ms. Pryor is teaching. After we stretch, she has us each take a pen and a board and to write down answers to a few questions.

Here are the questions and my answers:

What's the most challenging move for you: turning kicks, especially wheel kicks
What would you like to work on today: the above plus board breaking
What are you good at/what do you enjoy doing: flying side kick, sparring
What will you break with today: jump reverse kick

Ms. Pryor reads the boards.

"Class line up!"

"Yes, ma'am."

And we get started.

Working out alone

I'm at the college in the middle of the day. I have about 30 minutes before I need to be somewhere and I'm going to use them to work on forms. I grab some workout clothes and go across the street to the college's racquet center where Brian and I work out on Wednesday mornings.

"Could you turn the lights on in one of the back racquetball courts?" I ask the girl at the desk.

The court has one glass wall, and I can see my reflection in it, like the mirror at ballet. I face that way and go through my new form, Palgwe 6, a few times. Then I stop and go over some of the middle moves that give me trouble. I do this about 5 or 6 times.

It reminds me of practicing flute or piano, how my teachers told me to isolate the measures that gave me trouble and play them slowly, then faster until I could get through them without trouble.

Then it's on to Chun Gun. That one also needs some work. I figure out the troublesome moves, run them a few times, then the whole form.

It's just those two forms today, but it's enough. By the end of the 30 minutes, I'm too tired to do them with any power at all. But it's been helpful.

When you do a form with someone else, it's easy to watch out of the corner of your eye, so you don't have to rely completely on your memory. But alone--that really makes you realize what you do and don't know. I guess that's what today's practice was all about.

Summer

The weather has finally taken a turn toward summer here. Last night we had thunderstorms roll through, and today it's humid and alternately sunny and overcast.

It feels like summer.

Yesterday at ballet, we noticed the difference. After class and rehearsal, Lehrin and I talked about it. "It's really hot!" she said, wiping her face with her towel. "Yeah, I'm remembering what summer ballet classes are like," I replied, fanning myself with the curtains.

Advantage: the hot humid weather makes stretching easier. Disadvantage: being wringing wet at the end of class. Because ballet is hard work--fun and beautiful, but hard work.

You've seen the ballerinas after they do an exciting pas de deux: they glow--not just with pride, but with sweat, winter or summer!

Movie from our trip!

I didn't mean to make a movie.

I meant to take a photo of Justin doing a handstand. It's his specialty; the kids were asking him to do handstands at various points of our trip.

So I set up to take a photo of Justin doing a handstand near an overlook. But my camera was accidentally sent on "movie!" You can see the movie here, though it's sideways. At the end, you can tell I'm turning the camera over and saying "Oh no--I made a movie!"

Good thing I'm a writer, not a filmmaker.

Justin doing a handstand movie.

TKD trip report

"So your school went up northeast yesterday--to a tournament?"

I'm at church, talking with the dad of a boy who goes to another TKD school.

"No," I answer. "We weren't at a tournament. I think the purpose of the trip was fun. And bonding. And we got some awesome photos."

I don't have the awesome photos--Ms. Pryor took them. But I did have my little digital camera and got a few fun photos.

I ended up driving on the trip, which was fine--my van was relatively clean and had a full tank of gas. I also got free "How to be a More Aggressive Driver" lessons from Justin, who rode shotgun. ("Are you going to let him pass you like that?!") I think I probably failed those lessons. Robbie enjoyed the trip, too--seeing the sites and visiting with the TKD kids.

Here we are at a small town with beautiful limestone bridges over the river. The kids are looking at a snake that had been sunning itself on the bridge.

We hiked through a couple of state parks. I loved the woodsy trails and steep hills. I pointed out wildflowers to anyone who'd listen: wild ginger, wild geranium, dame's rocket, and jack-in-the-pulpit. We also saw a Baltimore Oriole and an eagle.

The limestone bluffs meant there were plenty of caves and caverns. As we approached this one, a group of men were singing "How Great Thou Art" here in 4-part harmony. The cavern made a nice "shell" and projected the singing. After the singers left, the TKD kids enjoyed the cavern.

Near the caves and in the woods, the mosquitos were fierce! Many of them weighed a pound.* I was glad I had my mosquito repellant.

Here are Robbie and Patrick by a lookout.

The kids had their own table at lunch.

We adults were more staid. Master Hughes and Ms. Pryor were happy and relaxed hosts, telling us stories of trips they'd taken.

The views from the bluffs were fine.

I am looking forward to sharing some more TKD photos--we all put our uniforms on and took group shots at, believe it or not, a junkyard. Ms. Pryor used several rolls of film. I hope to share some of those on this blog soon.

Late in the day, the group started to break up. Some went home, some went out to eat, but I took Robbie and Justin back to the park to explore caves (Robbie's request). We had a good time.






We grabbed a bite to eat on the way home, in a town with this lovely sculpture!

As we neared home, I spotted Master Hughes's van by the side of the road. I stopped to see what was up--he'd had car trouble and was waiting for a tow. I took his daughter Gabi home.

By the time Robbie and I got home, it was 9:30--we'd been gone since 8 a.m.! All the fresh air (and driving) mean that I needed a nap today to recover.

So was it a good "bonding" trip? I think I would have preferred less driving and more hiking, not just for the exercise but also for the chance to visit more with everyone. Still, we got a chance to do something fun and see something new together, which made for a truly enjoyable Saturday.

*You're supposed to ask "How many?" according to my great-uncle Bob.

TKD trip!

Tomorrow a bunch of people from the dojang are going on a trip to visit a state park with this lovely view of the Mississippi!

It's a TKD trip, billed as a "workout" (we are going hiking), but I think it'll also be a great time to enjoy being with TKD friends in a new setting.

Robbie is going along, and has been talking about it all week. I will take my camera and post a trip report when we return (probably Sunday, as we will be gone ALL DAY on this trip).

Relaxing?

So before I get my massage today (I finally decided to treat myself), Courtney asks what I've been doing to make my back and legs stiff.

"Oh, the usual--tae kwon do and ballet."

"Well, the ballet must be relaxing, anyway," she says.

Relaxing?

I love ballet, and those first few pliés feel great. But relaxing?

I sometimes tell my writing students that writing well might not be fun, but it can be deeply satisfying.

To me, that's ballet, too. Challenging barre work, dancing in center floor, finally getting a difficult petit allegro combination: it may be exhausting and difficult, but it is also deeply satisfying!

TKD and ballet

I want to thank you, dear blog readers, for all your comments--here, by email, and in person, about how I might deal with Jason. I've gotten a wide variety of suggestions. All of them show that you care about the situation and about my safety! I think I'll take Kicker Chick's advice, and perhaps Justin will also help at class. Thank you all.

No TKD today. But odd things happened in ballet: some good, some not good.

Good
The pirouette muse was smiling upon me. I could go around smoothly on one leg (that's a pirouette!), even did a double (well, more like 1 1/2.)

Not So Good
When it came to tour jetés, I just was having all sorts of trouble. Unlike pirouettes, they don't usually give me trouble!

In a tour jeté,you leap, one leg in front, and switch directions--and legs--in mid-air. Very fun, usually. TKDRocker, you'll like this if you take ballet! It's sort of like a tornado kick.

By the time we were practicing our recital piece, I had a major tour jeté block going.

Does this ever happen to any of you--in whatever activity you enjoy? You know you can do something, but one day you just can't?

I figure I'll be able to do it next time. Just like pirouettes today!

Revenge as teaching?

OK readers. So far, two people have told me that I should be the one to "teach Jason a lesson" for clocking me in the nose, and that the lesson should involve hitting him back, in the face or in another . . . tender . . . area.

So I want to know: is this appropriate?

And more importantly, would "getting him back" keep him from doing it again--to me or to others?

My intuition says "no." I don't think he meant to kick me in the face. He doesn't have enough control to do that.

If he does have that kind of control and meant to kick me in the face, would "getting him back" keep him from doing it again? It makes me think of my boys, fighting. "This is what it feels like!!!! (whack)" But maybe that's what works with testosterone-based life-forms. Or in TKD.

Anyway, any additional thoughts from you blog readers? Post, e-mail, or talk to me in class.

Mother's Day

I'm over being upset about being clocked yesterday. Sorry if I sounded annoyed. It's a contact sport. Gotta get used to that.

Today, actually all weekend, I've been thinking about my mother. I just talked to her on the phone. Yes, she got the flowers I sent (a pot of lilies of the valley, not yet in bloom). She'd seen my brother, hadn't yet heard from my sister. Wondered how I would spend the day. Asked about the boys. I wished I could be there, or that she could be here.

At our TKD promotional tests, there's always a moment when Master Hughes asks "who's the most important person here today?" The answer is not "you, sir," though often a child says that. "It's your mom and dad," says Master Hughes. "Now go give them a hug."

It's a nice point of the test, with children running back to Mom, Dad, Grandma, or Grandpa. Sometimes Mom or Dad is on the dojang floor taking the test alongside them. Master Hughes wants the kids to remember how much parents' encouragement and support means when learning a new activity, whether it's ballet or soccer or TKD. Sometimes parents show support by learning alongside their children, other times, they offer support from the sidelines.

My mom was never a sports mom with me. She didn't sign me up for sports when I was a child. That's mostly because I wasn't interested.

I wasn't a very athletic child.

Actually, that's an understatment. I was the last to be chosen for kickball, the first to be thrown out in dodgeball, the one who couldn't do even one "pull-up," the skinny girl with little coordination and less strength.

Today, a mom would definitely sign that kid (me) up for sports, don't you think? Wow, I needed physical activity, some way of getting stronger. But then (late 60s, early 70s), it wasn't done, at least not by my mom.

My mom supported our activities, but let us kids decide what it was we wanted to do. I wanted piano lessons (so I could learn to play like Mom), so she signed me up. Later, it was flute. Occasionally, I bugged her to sign me up for art classes. When I was a horse-crazy 10-year-old, my mom found ways for me to learn to ride horses, an expensive and rare activity in our suburban neighborhood. But it was really my thing, not hers. She was never a "horse show mom."

I have a very strong memory, though, of one time my mom made the first move to get me involved in something physical. I was in high school, not doing any kind of physical activity. (Today I find that hard to believe!) Mom found a modern dance class and encouraged me to sign up. Once I got started, Mom got out of my way and let me keep going. I did, despite being really awful at dance when I first started.

Lots of kids at TKD have very active moms. If they're not cheering from the soccer or TKD sidelines, they're doing a step class, or running, or doing TKD. My mom was never like that.

I don't ever remember my mom--or my dad--"exercising" when I was a kid. Although both of my parents were relatively fit and energetic, they were not good role models in the area of recreational exercise.

That is, until I was in college, about the time my mom was, let's see, mid to late-40's. She and I got into the early-80's aerobics craze at the same time! And she began taking daily early-morning walks with friends, which she continued (every morning at 6:30!) until her stroke in 2002.
Even today, she continues with exercise sessions for the wheelchair-bound, and has private workouts with a personal trainer. Now that's dedication.

So how has my mom helped me to become the Taekwondomom?

Mom always gave support when necessary (rides to the stable, getting me started in dance) but mostly, she stepped back and let me find my own passions.

Today, as taekwondomom, I'm doing martial arts because I wanted to do them not because someone says I should. I don't need someone saying how wonderful it is that I'm learning TKD. I don't need a family member say that I'm good at it. I don't need to be reminded to keep up with it--because I've found something I can be passionate about.

Mom helped me learn to find activities I can be passionate about and make them my own, to find rewards in just doing an activity, not in looking for a reward in praise from someone else. And today, she's showing me how to remain dedicated to what you love, even when adversity strikes.

Those lessons have shaped who I am as an adult student--a student of ballet, of writing, of Tae Kwon Do.

Thanks Mom!

Clocked

Is it possible to refuse to spar with a fellow student?

I got clocked again--in the nose--by Jason. This is the 2nd time it's happened, and he hits hard! I saw stars for quite a while and my eyes watered. After that, I had a headache and my vision wasn't right for about 20 minutes.

I suppose I should have blocked it.

Problem with sparring 13-year-old boys: they have poor control (this is supposed to be light-to-no contact). They flail gangly legs around which makes it very hard to see where they'll hit. They think it's cool to hit hard. They are probably suffering testosterone poisoning.

Jason was a bit sorry he got me in the face, but was mostly gloating after we started back up and he got a few points off me (no surprise).

Someone bigger than me needs to teach that lad a lesson.

I recovered enough after sparring to participate in a rousing couple games of noodle hockey, scoring one (or was it two?) after catching a pass from Justin.

"We're a good team. I think we should go pro," I told him.

"You were offsides," said Brian, whacking me with his noodle.

Offsides? "I was just tired." Yes, I whacked him back.

John and Dillon were impressed, even though our team lost. "Let's fire everyone but Jane," one of them said. "She scored."

Moms rule.

In general, a good workout with lots of stretching, some work on slow and fast kicks (adagio and petit allegro, as we'd call it in ballet). Justin led class for the first time in a while (that I've been there). I hope he has enough energy to enjoy his prom tonight with Chelsea!

Ballet and TKD

Maybe some of you have read TKDRocker's blog recently. She's thinking about taking ballet! This is what she says:

At my voice lesson yesterday, I was informed that I should look into taking a ballet class. I plan to go to college for musical theatre, and to do that, I have to be able to dance . . . I want to improve my chances of getting into a musical theatre program, but that would mean cutting back on TKD. Its a decision that I'm struggling with, but I think that I will look into taking a basic ballet class, just to give me a good base in dancing. TKDmom, any advice on this? How does your ballet affect your TKD, and vice versa?

Cutting back on one (beloved) activity to make room for another--now that's a difficult decision!

This question--how does ballet affect my TKD and vice versa--made me think. I've been taking ballet and other kinds of dance longer than TKD, so it's a bit hard to say. But I think that being a dancer has helped me with balance, flexibilty, and quickness. I'm also used to learning combinations of movements. Plus, when you dance, you often need to move with a partner, which helps in sparring.

I told TKDRocker to let me know about her decision about taking ballet. I want to know what it's like going the other direction--from TKD to ballet! I'm sure that her background in martial arts will help be useful when she dances or does theatre!

Changing Workout Schedule

I'm lucky to have a pretty regular schedule when it comes to exercise. This is partially because I have a weird and flexible working schedule. (Be a professor/writer if you want a flexible schedule!)

It's also partially because my exercise involves being enrolled in classes that meet on certain days. But Life as a Mom means that I sometimes have to switch things around.

Usually, I do TKD M and Sat., then ballet T Th. Plus, Brian and I often get together for a short workout on Wednesdays. (That's mostly a brain workout, to help us keep the many forms in our memories! It helps.)

Last week, my schedule was a bit different. I did TKD M and W, then ballet T and Th. By Thursday, I was exhausted! Something about 4 days in a row of intense workouts--it was almost too much for me.

Gentle reader, what's your usual workout schedule? Maybe "workout" is too severe a word. What's your usual way of staying active? Do you martial artists take class more than 2 or 3 times a week? And those of you who do other things--is anyone living up to the govenment's suggested 30-60 minutes of exercise a day? (And I believe walking to work/school--that sort of thing--counts as exercise!)

Would you like to have more time to be active?

Just wondering!

Counterintuitive

Things that are counterintuitive:
1. Greeting blackbelts at class. My intuition is to greet people I know and people who look lonely or in need of greeting!
2. Moving toward an attacker for a self-defense move. I pointed this out to Ms. Pryor yesterday and to Master Hughes today. But, as Ms. Pryor said, we are stronger closer to our own bodies, especially women. So moving in is necessary sometimes--even when the object is to get away.
3. Working on my form alone. I'd much rather work with someone. When Brian is away, like he was this evening, I'm at a loss before class when we're supposed to be working on forms. It just seems, well, counterintuitive to work on a form all alone. Luckily Brittany was in class this evening, and wanted me to work with her on Palgwe 5. We worked on forms together.

Weapons and Friends

Weapons
Some people seem to love weapons. Here's Robbie at the Faire.



There were lots of people selling "real" swords. Most had signs saying people under 18 couldn't look without supervision. So I stood at one booth while Robbie randomly but enthusiastically handled every one of the weapons there! ("Mom. Look at this one." "Mom. Isn't this cool?" "Mom. Can I get this one, please?")

I wasn't interested in the swords, but found his interest amusing!

Friends
I saw a surprising number of people I knew at the Faire.
--Mindy from TKD, who sat with me at the first martial arts demo,
--Mr. Schmidt and two of his daughters. They haven't been to TKD in a while--there's a new baby at home. Mr. Schmidt had a great costume, though.
--Mike from ballet and his wife. Mike did get a costume!
--Karen and her family. Robbie was glad to see Karen's son, Eric. They had a sword fight--perhaps that's the way 11-year-olds greet each other.
--Mr. Houtz and his family were over watching the afternoon martial arts demo. Mr. Houtz was my first TKD teacher, who hasn't been at the school recently. He said he also found bo interesting and would like to learn it. I was very glad to see him and update him on my TKD progress.

I made sure to get a photo of our little group before we left.

Martial Arts at the Faire

Contrary to popular belief, I did not spend the entire day at the Martial Arts pavillion at the Renaissance Faire yesterday. See, here I'm being blessed by a fairy!


But I did end up seeing all three demonstrations by the local Samurai Arts dojo, the Jade Tiger Dojo.

The first demo started soon after we got there. I sat next to Mindy, from TKD! It was nice to see her. After the demo, I talked to a few students and expressed my interest in seeing bojitsu. Cassie, a student at Jade Tiger, was happy to talk to me and glad to answer some of my questions. She pointed out that the bo was often used by women, historically.

"The men would go off to war and take the swords with them," she said. "So women had to be ready to defend themselves with whatever was available." Interesting!

"I'll let them know you're interested in seeing bojitsu, and they'll be sure to use bo in the next demo," she told me. "Come back at 2:30."

So I did.

The demo began with sword forms, with the students using "bokken" (sticks) to practice. I found as I took pictures that taking pictures really distracted me from watching. So these are my only photos, of the sensei's daughter doing a sword form.



After sword forms, they brought out the staffs to practice bojitsu, which looks a lot like Aikido to me. It uses flowing graceful movements to block and even throw opponents. But the 6' bo staff is used instead of hands. The bo was also used to strike or stab opponents.

After that demo, I had lots of questions, and I got to talk to the sensei. (Do you say "the sensei" like "the professor"? Or is it only a term of address more like Mr. or Ms.?)

He talked with me and some others for quite a while. I had lots of questions! This is some of what I learned:
*The students at this dojo do not compete in tournaments. Their "samurai arts" approach is so unusual--and very traditional--that there are few other places where students learn these arts in the same way.
*They do no free-sparring with swords, not even with bokken! For obvious reasons, if you think about it.
*Ki-haps in Aikido are different from those in TKD. In TKD, the ki-hap either ends with a consonant or is glottal (sound is stopped by the glottis) to tighten the diaphragm for hitting or being hit. This is because we use them in striking, blocking, and kicking, where there's a definite end point to your energy.

In Aikido, the ki-ais end with a vowel, in order to let the sound continue on, just as the energy continues until the opponent hits the ground.

It was fun to learn new things talking with the Jade Tiger group. I'm thinking I might get out there sometime. Maybe I'll take Robbie to their summer "camp" this summer. Here he is in "sword" fights with his friend Jacob and then with one of the young Jade Tiger students.



Or--maybe, someday, I'll go there to learn bojitsu.

Traitorous?

I'll admit it. I've been looking at another martial arts school's website.

Don't worry, TKD friends, I'm not thinking of leaving our school! I am pleased with the instruction I get there, with the fellowship of the students, with my progress as a martial artist.

But my frustration with hand and arm board breaking (and some of the comments I've received when I asked about breaking injuries on Karate Forums) made me wonder how I might find martial arts practices that are best for me.

I don't have a particular loyalty to Tae Kwon Do. I like the kicking and sparring; I like the forms. Yet, my goal is not to be a Tae Kwon Do champion (or even expert) but to be a martial artist. By that I mean someone who's focused and strong, someone who can demonstrate the graceful, powerful movements of forms, someone who is competent and unafraid of sparring. None of that has to be Tae Kwon Do. Other martial arts fulfill those goals.

Anyway, I spent some time looking at the website of a nearby school that teaches "Samurai Arts," the Jade Tiger Dojo.

Jade Tiger actually got me started in martial arts! After I saw an Aikido demonstration by that school a couple of years ago, I started thinking about learning martial arts myself. In fact, I liked the idea of learning Aikido . . . except for the falling down part! (Aikido uses joint locks and throws rather than punches and kicks.) Plus, that school is a good drive from my house: about 30 minutes. Our dojang is a quick 5-10 minute drive from my house.

Still. I like some things about Jade Tiger. The teacher seems knowledgeable about and interested in teaching about Japanese culture and history. He has swords classes for children. And he teaches other weapons, like bo or staff.

Unlike my boys, I'm not interested in weapons, generally. But something about the bo--its simplicity, perhaps--makes me wonder what it would be like to learn forms with it, to spar with it.

I'm staying where I am now, but maybe at some point I will take classes in bo at the Jade Tiger.

Maybe I could substitute bo for board breaking!

Bruises

"That looks worse than it did at suppertime," Bruce said when he saw my arm last evening.

Suki had commented on it during ballet, too. "Do you need an intervention?" she joked.

I'm a bit annoyed by this bruise on my forearm. I did not break the board with this part of my arm--I couldn't have. This bruise popped up the next day, as a small black and blue knot. The area of my arm that broke the board, back closer to the elbow, is fine.

Only thing I can figure is that this is where my arm dragged through the broken board.

I posted a question about it on Karate Forums the other day:
Can you get lasting injuries from board breaking?

I ask because that's what worries me when I break. I'm small and have small, not-very-dense (according to my doctor) bones. (I am 44.) Even if I break correctly, am I in danger of a lasting injury? Not the usual bruises or scrapes that I usually get, but an injury to bone, joint, etc. I ask because I broke a board with an elbow strike the other day--correctly--and a day afterwards, a black-and-blue knot appeared on my arm, near my wrist, probably where the board hit it as I broke through.

Several people answered. One post:

If you bruise really easily, you might ask your doctor if there are vitamin supplements that will help with blood vessel elasticity.

Hmm. Are my blood vessels un-elastic? This makes me feel old and fragile :-(

Another post:

I would be very careful about breaking boards with your condition. Is it needed in your martial art to promote in rank? What does that mean to you? What does your health mean to you? While a single board, if held and broken correctly, probably won't cause you harm, I'm not about to speculate on what repeated breaks will do. I would also avoid breaking multiple boards/bricks/etc. Best piece of advice? Talk to your doctor about it, and be honest with him.

My condition? Wimpiness? I guess my condition is "close to osteopena." (Osteopena is close to osteoporosis.)

I wonder if I could get very far as a martial artist if I don't break multiple boards and don't break with my hands or my joints. I wonder if I could still continue toward the black belt if I take this (sensible-sounding) advice.

Noodling

This is noodle hockey.

I probably should have taken a movie so you could see the crazy action. Of course, you'd miss the shouts and laughter, the noodle hockey sound track.

Monday night we also did some SPARRING! And I was very glad, because we haven't done it in a while. I felt rusty; couldn't quite remember the combinations that work with slow people, tall people, etc. But it was good.

Brian and I sparred during the last match-up. That's always fun. At one point, I pushed him back and he made a dramatic (and probably unnecessary) fall. So I stood there laughing and then heard applause--everyone else in the dojang had turned to look at us and they were applauding us--and laughing, too. "Way to take down the big guy," Brian A. said. I showed my biceps (such as they are) and bowed.